Just for a laugh!

I got forwarded this in my mail box and thought I would post this up. It's abt Malaysians way of speaking English. It's pretty common amongst malaysian and singaporean teens I'd say. So, just sit down and think abt it, you'll find it funny. Who knows, it's simple, short and straight to the point. Anyway, it made me smiled after reading this. Enjoy!

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.


RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who page?


ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get through. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-ksue me!


WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No-need, lah.


WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ah?


WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!


WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?


WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't want la...


IN DISAGREEMENT, OVER A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you've said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?


WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate.
Malaysians: Shut up lah!


WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you've been staring at me for some time. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?


WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
Malaysians: Die-lah!


WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what had just happened?
Malaysians: Wat happen? Why like that?


WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it, here let me show you,
Malaysians: like that also don't know how to do!


WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me!
Malaysians: Celaka u / Shit lah u!